Fairy Snow

The snow we had this morning was just gorgeous. I grabbed my camera and ran out even though it was still snowing, because I knew once the snow stopped, the blossom on the trees would be gone. Just like all beautiful things in our lives, they disappear real soon.

Boxing Day

It's Boxing Day today.  I did't need anything, but I still went shopping.  As I had always, every year.  This year, I went to Scarborough Town Center.  

We were very lucky to find a parking spot in the first 10 min of our arrival, as the cars were lining up on the streets.  And what's the first thing I saw as I stepped out of my car?  A $20 bill.  Lying on the ground, dirty and muddy.  I call it the money from heaven (or hell). Wherever it came from, I am going to donate it.

There were so many people in the mall that I think I developed people phobic in the few hours there.  All the stores looked like they were robbed.  Shelves are empty and things scattered all over the place.  People bumping into each other, people blocking the pathway, kids running around, screaming.  Ah... headache!

In this huge chaos, I am proud to say, I didn't lose my temper, only irritated (that non of the stuff I really want was on sale), and still managed to get a couple of items. 

I had good day.  I hope you all did too.

Kraft Dinner

It must have been 10 years since I last had Kraft Dinner. It used to be one of my favourites, but it got cut off because "it's really not good for me". Well, I found a box of Kraft Dinner in my kitchen cabinet. Don't ask me how long I've had it. I've got no idea. I think this box was actually one of my friend's, and I took it from him because "it's really not good for him". Anyways, after all these years, I finally opened it up. And cooked it. And ate it....okay, some of it. It's really not that good. Not sure if it's because it's on the shelf for so long.

I think I'll just make mac and cheese from scratch from now on.

It's the most wonderful time of the year

It's Christmas time again.  Lights everywhere, colors everywhere, music everywhere, and shopping bags everywhere.   People seems to be nicer to each other at this time of the year.  Sincere or not sincere, calling each other to ask how they are doing, sending greeting cards to families and friends, hugs and kisses telling them "I love you". 

It's the most wonderful time of the year.

After The Snow

It was snowing, snowing, and snowing.  Felt like an eternity.  But it stopped.

Today was just beautiful.  The sun was shinning, the wind ceased.  This is the winter I love.  White, sunny, and peaceful.  I just had to go for a walk.

We had good snow.  Dry and fluffy.  A crisp sound followed every step I extended.  Very cheerful.

Kudos to he city workers for cleaning up the street so quickly.  They are like little fairies.   I had no idea when they did it.  Every house was also trying hard to clean their driveways.  Working very hard.

It started to get dark at the end of my walk.  Christmas lights was blinking in the dark.  The night was magical.  The show was on.

Attachment

Buddha said, all things are temporal on this earth and attachment to them will altimately create a feeling of lost and sorrow.

Looking around my home, I wonder how I've happened to accumulate so much..uh..which I hate to admit...junk. Not sure if I'm lost in it yet, but it sure creates a sorrowful sight. 

I came to this city with 1 suit case and 2 boxes of books. I remember one day, the house I lived in got broken into. All my roommates were devastated, and I just shrugged and said, I got nothing for them to steal.

Countless time, I say to myself, that's it, I'm going to clean up this mess, but things just got "filtered in" over and over again. 

A leaf which I picked up in an Autumn 10 years ago; a card from elementary school friend whom I already lost contact with; A piece of fabric which I bought because it's pretty; Piles and piles of tickets and information booklets which I collected on my trips. 

And of course, the unforgivable ones, my wardrobe.  5 winter coats, though I do wear them all; 3 pair of gloves just sitting around, doing nothing for the past few years; Many tank tops because they are cute.  

And last but not least, the real garbage, paper with things I wrote down and hoped one day I'd revisit and make a great novel out of it. Revisit? Maybe. Novel? Who am I kidding.

Why, why, and WHY?  Why is it so hard for me to part with them?  Why am I so attached to them?  It sucks.

I really have to clean up this mess...one more time.

Because...

Unable to sooth the pain, therefore we bury.
Unable to forget, therefore we leave.

Wedding

Went to a wedding over the weekend.  Haven't been to such a good wedding like this one for a long time.  Warm and genuine.  A few of us stayed behind and we had quite a few drinks.  Alcohol made me a bit more friendlier than usual.  Everyone looked so happy and lovable.  We hold hands and we hugged and maybe a few kisses on the cheeks.  We tell each other how wonderful they are and what a great time we had.  At that moment, it just seemed that life was perfect.

About Me

Libra.

Holding black in one hand and white in the other, but forever wander in grey.

Color is a magical illusion played by the light, as beautiful as the rainbow after the storm, as faint as the dew-jewels in a chilly morning.

The color of my illusion is Lavender.

Tender Is The Night

Cavalcade of Lights, 2007.  Downtown, at the Nathan Phillips  Square.   

It was such a cold night, but felt warm.  

The skating range was full.  Kids screaming, people laughing.  A huge crowd in front of the stage, swaying with the music.  Don't know which band was playing, but the music was good.  

There were fireworks at the end, lighted up the sky.  I put the camera out of focus.  Through the lens, colorful bubbles glimmering and sparkling.  Each one struck something in my heart,  tendered the night.

The dozen mini doughnuts were the temptation of the night.  Still hot, with cinnamon.  These cute little things were irresistible.

Here is a song by Jackson Browne. Perfect for the night...

"Between the darkness on the street
And the houses filling up with light
Between the stillness in my heart
And the roar of the approaching night
Somebody's calling after somebody
Somebody turns the corner out of sight
Looking for somebody
Somewhere in the night

Tender is the night

When you hold your baby tight
Tender are the motions, tender is the night

Between a life that we expected
And the way it's always been
I can't walk back in again
After the way we fight
When just outside there are people laughing
Living lives we used to lead
Chasing down the love they need
Somewhere in the night

Tender is the night
And the benediction of the neon light
Tender are the hunters, tender is the night

..."

This Winter Is Especially Cold

People say, this year's Winter will be especially cold...

(First Winter storm in Toronto.  Out drinking...sober enough to leave the bar before it was closed.  I slipped and fell in front of the bar.  Surprisingly not embarrassed for some reason.  It was a beautiful storm.  I couldn't reproduce it through the camera.  The camera didn't feel the same way as I did.)

(p.s.  I remember looking out the window at the bar, the streets were white.  All cars were moving slowly and pleasantly leaving a responsibly distance between each other.  There were Christmas lights blinking at the window.  Warm and cozy.  The flags of Toronto Maple Leafs stretching and crying in the wind, like the games  themselves, strugglling.  And I, wished the time could stop.  Of course, it didn't...)

Fading

When a person leaves this world, all matter that's related to him will slowly fade away after him.  All that's left is a few broken photos and his image in our memories.

当一个人离开这个世界的时候，所有与他相关的事物都会一点一滴地随他消逝。所能留下的就只有几张残旧的照片和他在我们记忆中的影子。